Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Wishing only wounds the heart
Sorry! I’m sorry! I’ve been a horrible slacker lately. I know!
But my dad has been in town, and its been a whirlwind of Making Me Feel Like I’m Doing Nothing With My Life. Not to mention, the Oh-So-Fun constant barrage of questions from friends/family that never fail to give me the warm fuzzies.
“Don’t you want to have kids?”
“Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”
“What about a committed relationship? Are you opposed to those?”
And I do a very good job of just shrugging my shoulders and saying I don’t have clear ideas about what the future holds for me. When all I really want to do is scream at them and say-
“OF COURSE I want a long-term committed relationship! You think I ENJOY making my sister come clear across the country to take care of me after my tonsillectomy because I have no one else who can? You think asking my best friend to take time off work to pick me up from the hospital doesn’t make me feel awful? I HATE sleeping alone every night. I hate never having someone to hold my hand! I hate that I am so unbearably lonely sometimes that my Evil Ex-boyfriend looks like a more attractive alternative!”
Luckily, by the end of day today, my dad and all of his criticisms will be gone and I can go back to being content with my Unplanned Life. My life where no one throws my worst fears in my face on an hourly basis and would rather go back to his hotel to take a nap than spend an afternoon with me. Yeah, thanks for that. Always nice to know where I am on YOUR List of Priorities.
Today's Title from: I'm Not That Girl by Idina Menzel
But my dad has been in town, and its been a whirlwind of Making Me Feel Like I’m Doing Nothing With My Life. Not to mention, the Oh-So-Fun constant barrage of questions from friends/family that never fail to give me the warm fuzzies.
“Don’t you want to have kids?”
“Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”
“What about a committed relationship? Are you opposed to those?”
And I do a very good job of just shrugging my shoulders and saying I don’t have clear ideas about what the future holds for me. When all I really want to do is scream at them and say-
“OF COURSE I want a long-term committed relationship! You think I ENJOY making my sister come clear across the country to take care of me after my tonsillectomy because I have no one else who can? You think asking my best friend to take time off work to pick me up from the hospital doesn’t make me feel awful? I HATE sleeping alone every night. I hate never having someone to hold my hand! I hate that I am so unbearably lonely sometimes that my Evil Ex-boyfriend looks like a more attractive alternative!”
Luckily, by the end of day today, my dad and all of his criticisms will be gone and I can go back to being content with my Unplanned Life. My life where no one throws my worst fears in my face on an hourly basis and would rather go back to his hotel to take a nap than spend an afternoon with me. Yeah, thanks for that. Always nice to know where I am on YOUR List of Priorities.
Today's Title from: I'm Not That Girl by Idina Menzel
Labels: dad
