The Virginity Monologues

I didn't expect you to burrow yourself into my thoughts so deeply, so very quickly. How did this happen? Where did you come from?

I mean, yes, we've known each other incredibly superficially for over a year now. You've always said hi to me, very respectfully, occasionally even saying 'hi beautiful'. And yes, I've always had a mild crush on you, but it was never anything serious.

And yes, Tuesday night was totally and completely awesome. I've never been so glad to have finally gotten the courage to talk to you. And I'm so glad you asked to walk me home after I did so poorly with Dominoes. Then you came in, and we just sat and talked forever. You made it clear over and over again how much you liked me and how you had asked basically everyone on our block about me.

It was so natural when you finally kissed me. And I couldn't get enough. We kissed and kissed for hours. It felt like being in high school, except I never spent hours kissing boys in high school because the boys in my high school hated me. Then, you were trying to get me to make plans to see you again and nothing was decided because I just couldn't stop kissing you.

You took my number. You asked about a good time to call.

I went to sleep with an enormous smile on my face.

I really haven't stopped thinking about you since.

And I'm already anticipating how everything will go wrong. I do not inspire strong feelings of love and attachment. I imagine your interest will wane quickly, like they always do and I will be left feeling empty and bereft and wondering again what is so very wrong with me.

Today's Title from: I'm Not That Girl by Idina Menzel