Friday, September 29, 2006
Now I Gotta Cut Loose
I'm in a position that I haven't been in for probably over a year. My life is 100% completely man-free. There is officially no one left. All hangers on and fuck buddies have been eliminated.
Dave is gone. I've been taking a little crap for this, but I don't care how much money a man makes, if 'it' isn't there, then I'm not sticking around. Not worth it.
Scott, who has been SO good for the last 3 months, has apparently reverted back to Scott the Asshole and I don't want to deal with his shit anymore, I don't care how good the sex is. Surely, it'll be that good with someone else, right? Please say I'm right?
And those were really the only 2 men that I was at all involved with, and since they are both now gone, it looks as if I will never have sex again.
I'd like to say that it feels good. That it doesn't matter that I'm completely alone because I didn't let them push me around and treat me like crap, but really it just feels kind of empty. What do I think about now before I go to sleep at night? Who do I look forward to seeing now? Who do I wear my fabulous breast shirts for? Who can I practice blow-jobs on? (I still need some work in this area)
I'd like to take a break from all men until the end of this no-food-constant-work-0ut program. I'd like to be okay enough with myself to not need any validation from men.
To myself, I say only- Good Luck With That.
Dave is gone. I've been taking a little crap for this, but I don't care how much money a man makes, if 'it' isn't there, then I'm not sticking around. Not worth it.
Scott, who has been SO good for the last 3 months, has apparently reverted back to Scott the Asshole and I don't want to deal with his shit anymore, I don't care how good the sex is. Surely, it'll be that good with someone else, right? Please say I'm right?
And those were really the only 2 men that I was at all involved with, and since they are both now gone, it looks as if I will never have sex again.
I'd like to say that it feels good. That it doesn't matter that I'm completely alone because I didn't let them push me around and treat me like crap, but really it just feels kind of empty. What do I think about now before I go to sleep at night? Who do I look forward to seeing now? Who do I wear my fabulous breast shirts for? Who can I practice blow-jobs on? (I still need some work in this area)
I'd like to take a break from all men until the end of this no-food-constant-work-0ut program. I'd like to be okay enough with myself to not need any validation from men.
To myself, I say only- Good Luck With That.
