Friday, July 22, 2005
Another day, another disappointment
Well, it turns out that I didn't need to worry about being funny or cute, as the Jamaican was almost 2 hours late, so I told him to screw off. If someone's going to be that blase about punctuality on the first date, they are setting themselves up to be nothing but a disappointment for the rest of the relationship. Needless to say, he doesn't get another chance.
After I got off the phone with Mr. Bouncer, I realized that the stress and trauma of the last month had just caught up to me and I found myself on the corner of 34th and 7th, trying to hold back a tidal wave of tears. I called my best friend, told her I was meeting her at her place, ASAP, and hopped into a cab before I had the chance to publicly make a fool of myself. She made me homemade ice cream with my favorite candy bar in it and just let me cry and cry. I wasn't upset about the date. I wasn't that emotionally invested in him. I was upset about the stupid decisions that I have been making and the things about myself that are the motivations behind the stupid decisions. The best part? That I had R to go to. I didn't even go home, I spent the night at her place, needing to just spend as much time as I could with someone who saw the best in me.
After I got off the phone with Mr. Bouncer, I realized that the stress and trauma of the last month had just caught up to me and I found myself on the corner of 34th and 7th, trying to hold back a tidal wave of tears. I called my best friend, told her I was meeting her at her place, ASAP, and hopped into a cab before I had the chance to publicly make a fool of myself. She made me homemade ice cream with my favorite candy bar in it and just let me cry and cry. I wasn't upset about the date. I wasn't that emotionally invested in him. I was upset about the stupid decisions that I have been making and the things about myself that are the motivations behind the stupid decisions. The best part? That I had R to go to. I didn't even go home, I spent the night at her place, needing to just spend as much time as I could with someone who saw the best in me.
