Wednesday, May 09, 2007
And you can have this heart to break
I'm emotional today. The tears are close, and I imagine that it won't take much for them to start.
It might be that I am PMSing.
It might be that a phone call that I wanted desperately to come- didn't.
It might be the text message. From Marc. That pointed a finger at me. An unwarranted finger.
It might be that I am surrounded by wonderful, amazing women- and all of us are settling for less than what we deserve.
It might be that after I read Dooce, and she talks about her daughter and the love that she feels practically jumps out of the screen and chokes you- I feel my aloneness acutely.
It might be my inability to deal with certain situations. I am a worrier and a stresser. Small things will keep me awake all night. At times my anxiety is almost crippling. This causes me to worry more. I want to relax. I want to take a silent cell phone in stride. I want to be late to something and not have a panic attack about it.
I want to be okay.
Today's Title from: And So it Goes by Billy Joel
It might be that I am PMSing.
It might be that a phone call that I wanted desperately to come- didn't.
It might be the text message. From Marc. That pointed a finger at me. An unwarranted finger.
It might be that I am surrounded by wonderful, amazing women- and all of us are settling for less than what we deserve.
It might be that after I read Dooce, and she talks about her daughter and the love that she feels practically jumps out of the screen and chokes you- I feel my aloneness acutely.
It might be my inability to deal with certain situations. I am a worrier and a stresser. Small things will keep me awake all night. At times my anxiety is almost crippling. This causes me to worry more. I want to relax. I want to take a silent cell phone in stride. I want to be late to something and not have a panic attack about it.
I want to be okay.
Today's Title from: And So it Goes by Billy Joel
