Thursday, May 18, 2006
Home to Me
To My Dear, Loving Family-
Try as you might, there are no words that can be said that will induce me to move back home. The reason you all give for this proposed move, 'family', means something different to me than to you. You all have your own families- your own spouses, your own children, your own homes and your own cars. It's not like it was when we were all under 18, we won't be living in the same house, occasionally punching each other in the face and playing the Farming Game until 4 am. Those days are gone, replaced by early nights of child-tending and the occasional subdued act of sex which is now permitted to you by rights of God, having held on so tightly to the tenets of our religion. You mean the world to me, you do! My nieces and nephews are the joy of my life and I love them with enough ferocity as if they were my own children.
But I'm living my life for me. I have no desire to move back to Smalltown, USA, where I can run into every single person that I went to high school with, now married and procreating and feigning delight at my life, but secretly thinking that there must be something horribly wrong with me to be 28 (gasp of horror!) and NOT MARRIED!
I recognize that you all think that marriage must be first and foremost on my To-Do list, but that is because you are all suffering under the delusion that I am still holding tight to the No Sex Before Marriage rule. I assure that this is no longer a concern for me. I am quite satisfied.
I know what you see me as. The built-in babysitter. The cool accessory to show-off to your friends, with my New York wardrobe and an employee badge guaranteed to impress. It's a role I play the second my plane touches down.
I'd rather shoot myself in the head with a rusty nail then leave the comfort of my chaotic, frenzied, expensive, hedonistic, sublime life in The Big Apple.
I think I'll stay in New York a little longer, if you don't mind.
All my love-
Chloe
Try as you might, there are no words that can be said that will induce me to move back home. The reason you all give for this proposed move, 'family', means something different to me than to you. You all have your own families- your own spouses, your own children, your own homes and your own cars. It's not like it was when we were all under 18, we won't be living in the same house, occasionally punching each other in the face and playing the Farming Game until 4 am. Those days are gone, replaced by early nights of child-tending and the occasional subdued act of sex which is now permitted to you by rights of God, having held on so tightly to the tenets of our religion. You mean the world to me, you do! My nieces and nephews are the joy of my life and I love them with enough ferocity as if they were my own children.
But I'm living my life for me. I have no desire to move back to Smalltown, USA, where I can run into every single person that I went to high school with, now married and procreating and feigning delight at my life, but secretly thinking that there must be something horribly wrong with me to be 28 (gasp of horror!) and NOT MARRIED!
I recognize that you all think that marriage must be first and foremost on my To-Do list, but that is because you are all suffering under the delusion that I am still holding tight to the No Sex Before Marriage rule. I assure that this is no longer a concern for me. I am quite satisfied.
I know what you see me as. The built-in babysitter. The cool accessory to show-off to your friends, with my New York wardrobe and an employee badge guaranteed to impress. It's a role I play the second my plane touches down.
I'd rather shoot myself in the head with a rusty nail then leave the comfort of my chaotic, frenzied, expensive, hedonistic, sublime life in The Big Apple.
I think I'll stay in New York a little longer, if you don't mind.
All my love-
Chloe
