Thursday, January 26, 2006
Hard
I have a theory about oranges. The quality of an orange is directly related to the ease with which it can be peeled. If an orange is difficult to peel, it will invariably fall apart, get juice all over my hands and end result- not that great of an orange. The oranges that the peel seems to just fall off, also always pull apart perfectly and taste divine.
Relationships are like oranges. If it's too difficult to make happen- in the end, is it really worth it? The great relationships of my life (all 2 of them) have both happened with a relative amount of ease. The first, the 5 year high school/college boyfriend had a connection that was instantaneous. For the first 2 weeks that we knew each other, we saw each other or talked on the phone for hours, every day. We fell into the perfect friendship/relationship that was as comfortable as if we'd known each our whole lives. We fit perfectly into each other's families. But since neither one of us believed in sex before marriage, you can imagine how eager he was to get married. Since I wasn't ready yet for such a big step and wasn't sure that I loved him enough to take it with him, it had to end. A year later he married a girl that reminded me so much of myself that it freaked me out.
Relationship #2, the only man I genuinely ever loved, was equally as easy. From our first date, I knew that I loved him. Within 2 weeks, he declared himself the happiest he had ever been in his whole life. He became my best friend. Sex became a problem again, and eventually this relationship also had to end.
What I've learned from these 2 people in my life is that it doesn't have to be so hard. When it's real and genuine, it doesn't require games or lies. All it really takes is 2 people, being honest with themselves and open to letting someone else into their life.
No wonder this is so hard to find.
Relationships are like oranges. If it's too difficult to make happen- in the end, is it really worth it? The great relationships of my life (all 2 of them) have both happened with a relative amount of ease. The first, the 5 year high school/college boyfriend had a connection that was instantaneous. For the first 2 weeks that we knew each other, we saw each other or talked on the phone for hours, every day. We fell into the perfect friendship/relationship that was as comfortable as if we'd known each our whole lives. We fit perfectly into each other's families. But since neither one of us believed in sex before marriage, you can imagine how eager he was to get married. Since I wasn't ready yet for such a big step and wasn't sure that I loved him enough to take it with him, it had to end. A year later he married a girl that reminded me so much of myself that it freaked me out.
Relationship #2, the only man I genuinely ever loved, was equally as easy. From our first date, I knew that I loved him. Within 2 weeks, he declared himself the happiest he had ever been in his whole life. He became my best friend. Sex became a problem again, and eventually this relationship also had to end.
What I've learned from these 2 people in my life is that it doesn't have to be so hard. When it's real and genuine, it doesn't require games or lies. All it really takes is 2 people, being honest with themselves and open to letting someone else into their life.
No wonder this is so hard to find.
