Friday, August 12, 2005
Candy Memories
There is a bowl of Starbursts sitting on my desk. They remind me of Mike, my junior year of high school boyfriend. Our first date we went to a play, but the play was TERRIBLE, so to amuse ourselves, we bought a package of Starbursts at intermission and then had a contest to see who could eat their Starbursts in the most bites. I don't even remember who won. Our relationship was a roller coaster, with a breakup and a teary reconciliation all added in the mix. Our high school tendency towards dramatization evened itself out eventually and we settled into a perfect, easy companionship. There was a moment with Mike, that will go down as one of the most perfect moments of my life history. We were on a walk, on the side of a hill with a gorgeous view- I told him that I loved him, he told me that he loved me. I thought we were going to be together forever and I didn't think it would ever be possible to love someone more. Fall brought a drastic change to our routine- he was starting college, I was still in high school. We couldn't make the new shift work. There were months of fighting and arguing and just not making enough time for each other. It was one of the hardest things that I've ever done, but I finally ended our suffering. He was killing me, I told him. I needed him to not be in my life anymore so that I could heal and move on. I needed to repair the heart that had broken into a million pieces and I needed to do it without him.
Months later, I was sitting in my living room, cuddling with a new boyfriend, who's big, green truck outside my house declared his presence. The front door opened and Mike walked in (my house was very informal, most people never bothered with knocking or doorbells). He claimed he had 'been in the neighborhood'. Not likely. He sat down and talked to us. I thought my heart would beat out of it's chest. New boyfriend and I were together for about 4-5 years, off and on. We would eventually be engaged for a brief period of time, before I realized that I was 21 and that getting married would ruin all my fun. But I would never forget Mike, and a part of me never stopped loving him.
All these memories- one little Starburst.
Months later, I was sitting in my living room, cuddling with a new boyfriend, who's big, green truck outside my house declared his presence. The front door opened and Mike walked in (my house was very informal, most people never bothered with knocking or doorbells). He claimed he had 'been in the neighborhood'. Not likely. He sat down and talked to us. I thought my heart would beat out of it's chest. New boyfriend and I were together for about 4-5 years, off and on. We would eventually be engaged for a brief period of time, before I realized that I was 21 and that getting married would ruin all my fun. But I would never forget Mike, and a part of me never stopped loving him.
All these memories- one little Starburst.
