Tuesday, July 17, 2007
My side of the story
No change in my brother's condition. They were so concerned about the his lack of progress that they life-flighted him last night from Podunk Hospital to a hospital in our hometown, which is not enormous, but definitely has better medical care than a hospital in a town with a population of 2,000.
He arrived last night and treatment has been considerably more aggressive and the outlook is positive.
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I have always held a firm belief that there are 2 sides to every story and that most things in life aren't as cut and dry as we want to believe. It's something I try to remember in most situations and when I'm angry, I often try to consider the other person's point of view before letting my anger get the best of me. I don't always succeed.
Recently, Spatch wrote about her first meeting with Oscar.
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I interrupt this blog post to tell you that as I was just walking down the street to a meeting at another building, I saw Clinton Kelly of What Not to Wear fame and I almost had a heart attack. I didn't approach him, cause I'm generally against accosting celebrities, but it was still very exciting. Because I love him.
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Back to our regularly scheduled Blog Post.
Although, I still maintain that Oscar is a bit of a douche and I'm a little uncertain as to why I am still dating someone that I hate as much as I adore, he isn't QUITE as evil as Spatch described.
When he first arrived, and yes, he was late, Spatch was talking to a guy who I immediately didn't like as he practically oozed skeeviness. After Oscar arrived, him and I engaged in a 'tense' conversation which consisted of him asking me about family issues that I have been concerned with, and asking if Spatch need rescuing from The Crazy Australian, as Oscar also immediately got a bad vibe from him. Oscar reiterated his concern for Spatch's welfare many times to me.
No, I told him, she can take care of herself.
Spatch asked him his job. He asked her about her taste in men. He asked where Ana was and was disappointed at not being able to meet the third party of our trio. He talked to her about her issues with her current 'lover' (as she described him), and got the scoop on her new job.
To say that he didn't ask her a single question about herself, is not how I would have described it.
Spatch headed into the bathroom, and the Crazy Australian made a beeline for Oscar, despite the fact that we were clearly having a private conversation. Crazy Australian accused Oscar of giving him 'sideways looks' and was demanding quite drunkenly that Oscar explain himself. Oscar insisted he had no beef with the Crazy Ass-hat and just wanted him to go away, which he finally did. The bizarre exchange was instigated completely by The Weirdest Man I Have Met in a Long Time. If Oscar had his way, he could have gone the whole evening without ever having to interact with him.
At 1 am, a few hours after Oscar had happily been buying both mine and Spatch's drinks, we decided to call it a night. We all walked to the subway together, and Spatch gave us a minute alone to say our goodbyes as our route home took us in opposite directions. As we stood there in the hot subway, he wasn't ready to leave me, even though I had to leave for LaGuardia in a mere 3 hours.
He decided to go home with me, even though certain physical conditions on my part left sexual relations out of the question. He just wanted to be with me before I left.
We headed back up to my place, arriving at 2 am. The next few hours, he hung out with me and asked me about all the things in my room that make me inherently me, while I packed for my trip home. At 4 am, we hopped into a cab that dropped us both off at 125th street. He went into the subway, I got onto the M60 bus to LaGuardia airport. Neither of us having slept a wink. He held me tight and kissed me.
Once I got to the airport, he called to make sure I got there okay, and called me almost every day that I was gone. Making sure that I was weathering the family storms okay. Laughing as I told him the story of my sister-in-law's cornering me and asking me about the Myth About Black Men (regarding penis size). Offering sympathy and condolences as I cried about my brother.
It would be easier for me to put Oscar into a box and label it Bad Guy- Keep Away. But he has his moments, where he makes my whole world feel all put together with just a look, or a touch. He was eager to meet Spatch. And he's asked me every time I've talked him what she said about him. Maybe he didn't act the way she wanted him to, but he tried. And yes, I hated The Redhead, Spatch's boyfriend, but even he doesn't fit neatly into that box. He had his moments where he shined, as much as he had his moments where he was a COMPLETE douchebag.
The truth is that none of us fit neatly into any box. I've always wanted to be A Nice Girl, The Girl Who Would Never Treat A Man as Badly as I've Been Treated, but I've done it- recently in fact. There was a guy who was stalker-like in his pursuit of me, and because I was a chicken and didn't have the guts to just tell him I wasn't interested, I let it drag on way longer than it should have. I'm not proud of that. And now, someone can put me into the Girl-Who-Gives-All-Girls-A-Bad-Name box.
I am still undecided about Oscar. And it's not really about him being a bad guy vs. a good guy. It's that we have completely different relationship styles. And I have to decide what I can put up with and what I can't.
He arrived last night and treatment has been considerably more aggressive and the outlook is positive.
__________________________________________________________________
I have always held a firm belief that there are 2 sides to every story and that most things in life aren't as cut and dry as we want to believe. It's something I try to remember in most situations and when I'm angry, I often try to consider the other person's point of view before letting my anger get the best of me. I don't always succeed.
Recently, Spatch wrote about her first meeting with Oscar.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
I interrupt this blog post to tell you that as I was just walking down the street to a meeting at another building, I saw Clinton Kelly of What Not to Wear fame and I almost had a heart attack. I didn't approach him, cause I'm generally against accosting celebrities, but it was still very exciting. Because I love him.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Back to our regularly scheduled Blog Post.
Although, I still maintain that Oscar is a bit of a douche and I'm a little uncertain as to why I am still dating someone that I hate as much as I adore, he isn't QUITE as evil as Spatch described.
When he first arrived, and yes, he was late, Spatch was talking to a guy who I immediately didn't like as he practically oozed skeeviness. After Oscar arrived, him and I engaged in a 'tense' conversation which consisted of him asking me about family issues that I have been concerned with, and asking if Spatch need rescuing from The Crazy Australian, as Oscar also immediately got a bad vibe from him. Oscar reiterated his concern for Spatch's welfare many times to me.
No, I told him, she can take care of herself.
Spatch asked him his job. He asked her about her taste in men. He asked where Ana was and was disappointed at not being able to meet the third party of our trio. He talked to her about her issues with her current 'lover' (as she described him), and got the scoop on her new job.
To say that he didn't ask her a single question about herself, is not how I would have described it.
Spatch headed into the bathroom, and the Crazy Australian made a beeline for Oscar, despite the fact that we were clearly having a private conversation. Crazy Australian accused Oscar of giving him 'sideways looks' and was demanding quite drunkenly that Oscar explain himself. Oscar insisted he had no beef with the Crazy Ass-hat and just wanted him to go away, which he finally did. The bizarre exchange was instigated completely by The Weirdest Man I Have Met in a Long Time. If Oscar had his way, he could have gone the whole evening without ever having to interact with him.
At 1 am, a few hours after Oscar had happily been buying both mine and Spatch's drinks, we decided to call it a night. We all walked to the subway together, and Spatch gave us a minute alone to say our goodbyes as our route home took us in opposite directions. As we stood there in the hot subway, he wasn't ready to leave me, even though I had to leave for LaGuardia in a mere 3 hours.
He decided to go home with me, even though certain physical conditions on my part left sexual relations out of the question. He just wanted to be with me before I left.
We headed back up to my place, arriving at 2 am. The next few hours, he hung out with me and asked me about all the things in my room that make me inherently me, while I packed for my trip home. At 4 am, we hopped into a cab that dropped us both off at 125th street. He went into the subway, I got onto the M60 bus to LaGuardia airport. Neither of us having slept a wink. He held me tight and kissed me.
Once I got to the airport, he called to make sure I got there okay, and called me almost every day that I was gone. Making sure that I was weathering the family storms okay. Laughing as I told him the story of my sister-in-law's cornering me and asking me about the Myth About Black Men (regarding penis size). Offering sympathy and condolences as I cried about my brother.
It would be easier for me to put Oscar into a box and label it Bad Guy- Keep Away. But he has his moments, where he makes my whole world feel all put together with just a look, or a touch. He was eager to meet Spatch. And he's asked me every time I've talked him what she said about him. Maybe he didn't act the way she wanted him to, but he tried. And yes, I hated The Redhead, Spatch's boyfriend, but even he doesn't fit neatly into that box. He had his moments where he shined, as much as he had his moments where he was a COMPLETE douchebag.
The truth is that none of us fit neatly into any box. I've always wanted to be A Nice Girl, The Girl Who Would Never Treat A Man as Badly as I've Been Treated, but I've done it- recently in fact. There was a guy who was stalker-like in his pursuit of me, and because I was a chicken and didn't have the guts to just tell him I wasn't interested, I let it drag on way longer than it should have. I'm not proud of that. And now, someone can put me into the Girl-Who-Gives-All-Girls-A-Bad-Name box.
I am still undecided about Oscar. And it's not really about him being a bad guy vs. a good guy. It's that we have completely different relationship styles. And I have to decide what I can put up with and what I can't.
