The Virginity Monologues

Kids, I think I need to take a break from men. Something is going on with me, and I need to fix it before I can even allow myself to think about becoming emotionally involved with someone new. My biggest problem being that I am semi-emotionally incapacitated by my love of my ex. I can't quite grasp the concept that we will never be together again, and I desperately need to completely let go. I need to spread my little wings and find a new pistil for my stamen. The mail room guy keeps asking me out (the horrors!) and the other day I told him he didn't want me, I told him I was in love with someone else. He assured me that he could make me forget about said foe, but I found myself telling him that it was impossible, that this boy is "perfect". I meant it simply to fend off the amorous advances, but after I said it, I realized that I meant it. Boo. Must move on. Really.

I'm also going through a weird phase. I'm lovin the brothas. There are droves of them at my gym, and let me tell you, it isn't the treadmill that's got my heartbeat going. Not that this is in any way a bad thing. I'm just not certain where it is stemming from. Is it just a sexual thing, as I find them to be the most blatantly sexual men alive, or is that what I am really, geniunely attracted to? I should figure that out before I get myself into another realtor situation, hoping for a world shaking experience and leaving with my soul blackened a little, and my world, considerably unshook.

So, here I am 27, figuring who I am all over again. Soon, my friends, I can feel it. The virginity will be gone soon.